I was thinkin about the guy with two penises and I was like woah imagine two boobs then I was like wait
me living alone
- me: i should probably clean shit
- me: nah
Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush
Dentist: *Has multiple things in your mouth*
"So how’s school?"
i want to make a porn joke so bad
party at my house bring food then leave
nothing feels better than winning monopoly. not love. not sex. not free pizza. nothing
I’m sorry, have you tried pizza…?
yes and it doesn’t compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friends eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate
i like you